Second Time Around

So let's face it - I haven't exactly been throwing out the blogs lately.  And there is a very good reason for that...I haven't been doing anything!  Ok, ok - so yesterday I organized our file cabinet in the basement (exciting huh!?), but that is pretty much the extent of my productivity.

I find that this pregnancy has not made me nearly as sick as I was with Carly.  Yea, I still have my internal debate moments of "Do I or do I not throw up right now?".   And then there are the 9:30pm runs for Chinese food because orange chicken just sounded sooo good!  (yea, my husband thought I was crazy too).  But for some reason between the bouts of nausea, tiredness and my "Terrible Twos" Love Bug, I am just as useless and exhausted as I was the first time around.  And while I go to bed every night telling myself that tomorrow I am getting up and I WILL be productive, the morning comes and Carly and I are cuddled on the couch until ten reading books and watching all the morning shows together.  (Can I just say that I now know the "Hot Dog" dance moves of each of the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse characters!)

Soooo....with all that being disclosed - here is one more confession before my resolve.  I am starting to loathe this unproductive, tired, impatient person I have become.  I was on a roll there for a while.  Carly and I had our days filled with fun outings, projects and quality time that did not include becoming couch potatoes.  And while logically, I know this is a phase - a glip in the the grand scheme of things - and in my heart I know that it is all totally worth it because in a few months I will have our newest addition to the family.  My patience with myself is running thin. 

So my resolve - I draw on my words from a few posts back,

"I am determined to enjoy this pregnancy (penguin waddle and all) and find delight in every moment! ... I want to savor each moment during this time - just in case it is the last!  Sooo...bring on the morning sickness, extreme tiredness, expanding waist-line, and loss of bladder control!"

I said it, now I will live it!  I will appreciate (or at least stop loathing- appreciating might be reaching a bit) all my pregnancy woes this time around.  It means that my little kidney bean is growing!  I will rejoin the rest of the world and stop slothing through the days. 

And I will start treasuring these days with my Love Bug!  It just hit me that these are the last days of just the three of us.  Our last Halloween with just the three of us, last Thanksgiving, last Christmas!  It is kinda sad actually, in a bittersweet change of times kinda way.  But I know I don't want to look back and all I can remember are watching NickJr. on a couch.  Boo! 

So this marks a new day, a renewed out look!  Bring it!